Sunday, July 22, 2012
I Need Xanax!
I joke about it but I actually used to take Xanax for my anxiety disorder. I am proud to say that I haven't used it in over two years as I have been managing my anxiety just fine on my own, but now is when I wish I could take it. Since that scare a week and a half ago, my anxiety has been through the roof. I am just so fearful that something is going to happen and it is going to be my fault for not knowing that something is wrong. I am obsessing over the frequency and intensity of his movements and I even have been using my doppler as I know that he will usually kick at the probe.
After being discharged from the hospital on Monday I had office appointments on Wednesday and Friday to do NSTs and BPPs. As usual (or should I say normal) Giovanni was a little rock star and did great on both of those tests. The Chief MFM came into my ultrasound on Friday and told me that everything looks great. He is a man of few words so I never expect to get much out of him but I know that if he says it is fine, it is! I do have to admit that since hearing that from him on Friday that my anxiety hasn't been so intense and I have been able to function a bit better. I go back tomorrow morning for another NST and BPP so I am hoping for more reassuring news.